About the Author J. D. Santucci (a.k.a. "Tuch") began his railroading career in 1978 as a trainman on the Missouri Pacific. After a round of lay-offs in 1985, Tuch embarked on a railroad odyssey, working in many different situations for different roads. This column tries to explain some of the nuts and bolts of the job and also demonstrates what we have to deal with on a regular basis within and without the industry. Tuch currently works through freights out of Chicago for Canadian National/Illinois Central. ©1999, 2003-2007 JD Santucci. Logo ©2002 The Railroad Network. By J.D. Santucci

July 29, 2002
The beautiful bride has a birthday coming up July 31st. For quite a while I've been planning to write a piece about how difficult life in general can be when you're married to a railroader. This special occasion makes it the perfect time.

While I was young, single and on the extra board, playing the dating game was difficult. Other times it was an adventure. And still other times it was almost impossible. Many a relationship failed because of the job. Some of the girls I dated were not real crazy about me having to break dates or end them early because the railroad called. That made relationships tough enough. Never being exposed to this lifestyle at all could be culture shock. Some girls just couldn't cut the mustard I guess. Somehow through all of this, I managed to find one that could. It did take years of "conditioning" through years of marriage. And even then, there are still some interesting moments.

I was working at the South Shore in 1985 after getting laid off from the MoPac and was on the Brakeman's extra board. Much of the time I worked freight but many times I caught passenger. This morning in particular, I was working a passenger run. It was pouring down rain and had rained for a couple of days already. While checking and collecting tickets, I encountered some women riding in the vestibule of one of the cars. This was not unusual as we were overflowing with patronage. As I went through the rounds of checking their tickets, I began some small talk with them. Being that I was single, this was a great way to meet girls. Aside from the fact they were disgusted with having to stand for some seventeen or so miles, they all seemed pretty fed up with the rain.

I thought that perhaps they might appreciate a little positive spin on the weather, so I suggested they try to think of this as being like Portland. Even though it is raining now, when it stops, the view will be spectacular. They all thought I was nuts, but one of them seemed to take a bit of a shine to me. In the next few days that passed, we engaged in conversation aside from the weather. Eventually, I asked her out. Our first date was October 19th. We had a good time on our date, so I asked her out again and again. On New Year's Eve 1985, I proposed. We had made quite the evening of it along with three other couples, so there was quite the time had. The evening's celebration included, among other things, the consumption of significant amounts of alcoholic beverages. Hey, three of the other people were railroaders as well, so it was almost required by law.

After I popped the question the beautiful girlfriend asked "Are you drunk?" Of course I was drunk, she didn't think I would do something like this if I was sober, did she? But I lied and told her no and the rest as they say, is history.

Before we got married, I attempted to explain to her about how railroading really works. I explained the extra board, working nights, weekends and holidays, being on call and having plans changed or cancelled at the last minute. She claimed she understood all this and could deal with it all. If she really understood, she probably would have run away screaming and kicking and had a restraining order issued to keep me away. Instead, she stayed; little did she know what was in store for her.

As a reward for staying, the bride gets to do a lot of things without me. There have been weddings, funerals, parties and the like in which she was my "representative." I always tell her it is akin to the President and Vice President. Whenever the President cannot attend some sort of event or function he sends the Vice President in his stead. Thus far she hasn't bought into this theory, but one just never knows, perhaps one day...

Being the wife of a railroader can be difficult more often than not. Being the wife of this railroader can be difficult most of the time. I admit to being a pain in the ass, so just couple that up with the uncertainties of the railroad lifestyle. It is one helluva combination, certainly not for the faint of heart. The bride is of hearty Polish stock though, so she is one tough woman.

After not figuring on working until later (according to the Caller), I have been surprised with an unexpected earlier call on far too many occasions. Of course this immediately changed everything. The bride has responded quite admirably by throwing together a quick dinner while I was getting ready for work. Her ability to adapt to the sudden change allowed me to have many a good, home cooked meal instead of having to stop for fast food on the way to work. This scenario has played out more times than I can remember over the years.

Railroaders are in the top ten for divorce rates. Gee, what a surprise. The uncertainties of never knowing when we'll go to work, when we'll be back home, and being gone so often has a major effect on marriages. So does missing family functions, events with the kids such as school plays, band competitions, sporting events and the like. Of course, there is that always popular, more. Some railroaders have been known to have a wife at one end and a girlfriend at the other. I have heard stories of some having complete families at both ends of the line. Now that takes some balancing. More than one railroader I have known over the years has been caught when the wife showed up at the away from home terminal to find the old boy with the away from home flame. I have a tough time balancing one relationship and life, how in the world could I have two or more?

One girl I dated some years ago told me she was warned by her mother about railroaders. She said her mother told her that all railroaders have women in every town. I wonder where she heard that one. Perhaps in her younger days maybe mom dated a railroader. This girl laughed it off and stayed with me for a couple of years. Women in every town, eh? I wonder how it was that I missed out on this phenomenon. We wound up going down in flames and yes, the railroad was a factor. But no, it wasn't extracurricular activities.

But I digress.

I was very unhappy at the South Shore. Wait, let me rephrase that, I was miserable at the South Shore. They had promised I would be running an engine within six weeks after they hired me. Almost a year later and I was still on the ground. When I realized running an engine again wouldn't come anytime soon, the job search began again. I was searching for a job all over the country. I wound up at a couple of places in New England shortly after the beautiful girlfriend had graduated to beautiful fiancé status. This put a strain on things.

A few weeks before were married, I became another one of the unemployed in the rail industry. This is a really good way to start a new life. We postponed the honeymoon owing to this situation. Several weeks after we were married, I got a call from the Chicago Central & Pacific. They wanted me to come out to Waterloo, IA for an interview. I was off to Iowa two days later. I figured I would be home in a few days. Instead, they put me to work right away, out there. This too was really good for a brand new marriage.

I was stuck out in Waterloo and not able to mark up in Chicago right away. The bride was not at all pleased. Of course I wasn't real thrilled with the situation either. One day she called the hotel where I was staying in Cedar Falls, IA. I was out working and she talked with the woman who ran the place, a former railroader herself. From what I was later told, quite a bit of venting occurred. The woman at the hotel knew the Trainmaster very well and called him strongly urging they find a way to get me back to Chicago or I would likely be in divorce court.

After a month in Waterloo (with a few days off to get home for a bit), I returned to the Chicago area marking up at Hawthorne Yard. Even though I was back home again in Indiana, I was always gone. They were short of help and I worked constantly. The brand new beautiful bride was now getting a full dose and crash course in becoming the railroad wife. Several times after we went out for dinner and perhaps a movie (after being told I would not work until much later) I got the page to come to work. In a few cases, we were just heading out the door when the phone rang. I began to comment how the railroad gods were listening in, heard us making plans and did not approve. I started to suggest that maybe we not mention anything out loud so the gods could not hear. We should just pass notes instead. Gee, sort of like being back in school again.

Our first Christmas together was a bust. I worked very early Christmas Eve morning, like about 0300. They were planning on significantly curtailing operations for Christmas day so I figured this would allow me to be home for both Christmas Eve night and Christmas day. Instead, I got sick. As the workday on Christmas Eve morning progressed, I felt tired and had a sore throat coming on. We got done at around noon or so. Later that evening we met at some relatives of the bride's for dinner. That was when it hit me big time. A serious case of the flu knocked me on my hind side. This made for my early exit from dinner and had me sick in bed for Christmas day and the day after. Being that marriage is all about sharing, I shared this flu with the beautiful bride. She got my flu just in time for New Year's Eve. This probably really had her wondering (if not certain) that she had made a horrible mistake in marrying me.

After about a year of marriage, things at the CCP started going to hell. Layoffs were beginning to occur and the job search began yet again. Before the axe fell for me (or perhaps, on me), I landed a job at the Wisconsin Central, which was on the verge of beginning operations. This had me gone for several weeks to Fond du Lac, Wisconsin, which would become our new home. Several weeks later we sold the house in Indiana and moved to "America's Dairyland."

Wisconsin was culture shock to her as the beautiful bride was a big city girl having been born in Chicago and raised in the Suburban Chicago area. She adapted well though making friends and becoming active. Even though I was gone a great deal, she was able to keep busy and do things without needing me along. A bowling league and church activities, including choir were some of the activities she took up.

Within a few months I was able to work a regular assignment. This helped make the transition a little easier for her. At first I was on an assignment that had me working ten days in a row and then off four days, every other Thursday, Friday, Saturday and Sunday. With this schedule, we were able to do lots of stuff together. However, this job did not last and I wound up on an assignment that worked five days per week with two days off. Eventually I wound up on an assignment that worked six days and was off three. Even with this kind of schedule, I was still gone sometimes when events were taking place.

An opportunity presented itself for us to relocate back to Chicago in 1991 as Metra called me for an interview. I wound up getting hired there and returned to the Chicago area. However, it was just I going back for the first couple of months. The bride was stuck in Wisconsin alone for that time period. We sold the house and moved back to the Chicago area staying with father and mother of the bride until we found a home to purchase. A second move some three months later into our own place back in Indiana occurred and we have managed to stay put in the same house since then.

I have moved around to a couple of other railroads since we returned, but have managed to stay in the Chicago area. However, I still have been gone a great deal of the time though.

As you can see from our example, it is certainly not easy to survive as a railroad wife unless you are tough. And the example of my career is tame compared to some. I knew one Engineer who moved something like thirteen times in twenty years, with all but two of the moves being with the same company. I worked with a Conductor who moved nine times in ten years, again with the same company. In this guy's case though, he had no choice; it was either follow the work or starve. He would get cut-off at one location and go wherever he could hold at least a slot on an extra board. Big seniority districts have a way of doing that to employees.

It has become worse today on the railroads that have merged into the mega-systems. Employees may now have to cover seniority districts that encompass a six or seven hundred-mile radius. I know of several who have had to jump all over these districts just to keep working. Can you imagine what this can do to a marriage?

This type of activity has been going on probably as long as there have been railroads. And it was worse in one way before 1969 when the hours of service law changed. We used to have a sixteen hour work day. This meant a minimum of four more hours per trip gone from home. If you worked the road, that meant an additional eight hours per round trip in some instances. The guys that were the old heads when I started railroading talked of always working sixteen-hour days almost constantly in the 1950's and 60's until the law was changed.

Some railroaders I know have left the industry owing to marital problems caused by the job. Many of these guys were those that entered the industry after being married for a while. Some women simply cannot adjust to the lifestyle and it causes tremendous difficulties. Others remained in the industry but changed crafts to give them more of a semblance of regular life. Not all crafts in the industry work like us in transportation.

I know many railroaders who have had multiple marriages, oftentimes because of the job. There are some women who simply cannot handle such a lifestyle and wind up either leaving or throwing the old boy out. I have been fortunate though as my beautiful bride has stayed with me despite all this and despite me being me. Is it love or insanity? I'm hoping for the former but betting on the latter. She always tells me she is on a mission. I guess dealing with all of this will guarantee her a spot in heaven. She has already lived through hell.

And so it goes.